When we encounter a crisis in our day, big or small,  we usually resort to grabbing the nearest phone and call our “person” that we know has the “muscle” to pull us up and out, gently guiding us back to our internal compass in order to see the truth of the situation within ourselves as well as what is needed to be understood, realized, integrated and released, culminating in incorporated wisdom, which very quickly translates into a new perspective and heightened ability for compassion, both for ourselves and others.  Right?  Wrong.  (read this paragraph again, slowly, as it took me a long time to write it, and would just make me feel better, knowing you have spent a bit of time with it!)

For the most part, when we encounter a crisis in our day, big or small, we usually resort to grabbing the nearest phone and call our “person” that we know will co-conspire with us, empathize with our plight, fall into the pity-pot hook, line and sinker, and most importantly, let us know that they feel our pain and suffering.  Right?  Right.  We call our friend so that we feel less alone.  We call our friend so we don’t have to look at why we are feeling this way in the first place, over, and over, and over again.

Can you do anything to change this behavior and reality in your life?  Yes.   Many, are the reasons for why we feel this way, and there are just as many ways to tackle unraveling the ball of pain and confusion. One of the hardest and really, most frightening things to do, is to have a look at yourself and why you do what you do.  Many of us are indeed, scared of our very selves, and I have such great compassion for humanity in this regard.  This is a Tribal Issue,  and Archetype issue, and can take a great amount of courage to face.  For starters, when you start to disengage from the energetic link between you and someone in your life who is expecting you to be weak in a certain area, you will come up against resistance.  It always brings this work full circle to those you are in close contact with in your life, as it will ultimately  have an impact on their awareness levels , loops and energetic leaks.  You might find that there will be some friendships that you will choose to let go of, while others will thrive.  It is a natural sequence of events with this work.  (Carolyn Myss, a medical intuitive and phenomenal teacher has done a vast amount of research on Archetypes, what they are, and how to work with them.  See the suggested reading list if you are interested in further study on this topic).   Robert Ohotto also discusses this idea in his book, “Transforming Fate into Destiny”.

While you still might need to make that call, I would like to offer a suggestion prior to you making it.  Remember, there are energetic pieces of information that are being transmitted back and forth, and at the end of the conversation, one of you will feel “better” and the other a bit like they have just run a marathon and are in need of a nap, or cocktail!  While we know on a very intimate level that this does indeed take a lot out of our beloved friend, we make the assumption that this behavior is acceptable and a working part of our friendships and relationships.  It is what we have been taught, and it is what we know, so most of us accept this without question. (Tribal Issue)  While there may indeed be times in our lives that we need the loving arms of a close friend to hold us for awhile, I think the vast majority of our crisis moments need to be handled internally first to see if there are any loops that need to be addressed and paid attention to.  Start inside, then go outside if you still need it.

I can already hear  the, “yes, but’s” flying, but I just want you to give this a try.  Yes, there are complications involved within every crisis, absolutely, without a doubt.  Most have multi-layers that do indeed take time to excavate on your part.  The point is this:  You do not need to figure it all out this red, hot minute.  More than likely, it’s taken you years to get to this spot, this place of feeling and awareness, or this desire to finally make a change, so take a breath, tell yourself that you are so beautiful and loved, that you love you – no matter what, and will do whatever is needed to care for you, and take a step in a direction that aides and abets you in a positive, life-affirming way.  This exercise is a wonderful way to begin.

*Quiet yourself,  find your breath and slow your heart rate.  This might take you a bit of time, as the thoughts and feelings that are coursing through your system  are more than likely loud and demanding, if not yelling at the top of their energetic lungs.  Just breath, and calm yourself down, and pull in your auric field.

Next, focus on the color gold, as this is a protective color.  Fill your body with this color, spending time to send it to any area of tension in your body.   When we are in crisis, we need to feel safe and protected, so gold is a quick way to get there.  In reality, other chakra’s are in crisis, loops are revved up and rolling, but for a quick fix, this is the place to go.  After you have calmed down a bit, and the yelling in your head has dulled to a soft roar, instigate the Golden Cloth Exercise, making sure to fill yourself up with the Universal White Light.  Scrub away the film on your auric field, sever any chords that have connected themselves to your Solar Plexus, which is the chakra that is the seat of all energetic connections, and make sure that you.. are.. clear, aware and most importantly, YOUR VOICE IS THE LOUDEST VOICE IN YOUR HEAD. 

*This all might take 10 minutes for you to accomplish.  Then, decide if you need to make your phone call.  You might find that you no longer are in ‘need’ of someone else to pick you up and dust you off.  You’ve done it yourself, and in the process, have saved your friend some energetic time and energy to be used elsewhere in their day.